The park formerly known as Glacier

Contest in need of Grist readers and their funny 18

In a world without glaciers, what would you call Glacier National Park?

Tongues firmly in cheeks, National Environmental Trust is sponsoring a contest to come up with a new name for the park. The winner gets a $250 gift certificate to REI, but really, it's about calling attention to the fact that continued inaction on climate change might make the park glacierless by 2030.

Kate Sheppard is Grist’s political reporter.

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  1. caniscandida Posted 6:00 pm
    14 May 2007

    Well, it is a long shot ...Just so no one else tries this, my submission was: "We-can-finally-see-you-now,-you-gorgeous-mountains National Park."  Yuk yuk.
    Actually, the one and only time I was in Glacier N.P., almost twenty years ago, there was great fog, and the visibility of the glaciers was not at all good.  But still, I loved the moody atmosphere surrounding the lake, and the lodge, and the beautiful old boat, named the DeSmet as I recall, after the Belgian Jesuit missionary to the Flathead Indians and others in that vicinity in the 19th century, Pierre-Jean De Smet:
    http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/04752a.htm
    As sad as it will be that the glaciers disappear, we may well hope that the park remains a place of great beauty.
    It will be truly, unspeakably sad, that many living things will be pushed beyond the possibility of their continued existence in the park.  Nevertheless, let us hope that there will be some examples of adaptation to new environmental conditions.

    Chickens are our cousins!

    So are other sensitive animals!

    Enough is enough!

    No more factory farms!
  2. MarkUK Posted 6:39 pm
    14 May 2007

    uh..The Hummer playground?
  3. caniscandida Posted 7:06 pm
    14 May 2007

    on another subject:But I think this is true to the spirit of those who seek to preserve Glacier N.P., as best as it can be preserved:
    I hate the running lump of coal.
    But I love the baleen whales.  (Fin whales, or minkes I think, not humpbacks.)

    Chickens are our cousins!

    So are other sensitive animals!

    Enough is enough!

    No more factory farms!
  4. Ron Steenblik Posted 7:58 pm
    14 May 2007

    Glacierless ParkHow about "Big Thaw National Park"? (in the tradition of Big Bend National Park).
  5. Robert Delfs Posted 9:11 pm
    14 May 2007

    Very sad..Cocktail cube N. P.?  

    Robert Delfs
  6. planetthoughts Posted 9:53 pm
    14 May 2007

    ParkOK, "Global Warming National Park".
    Let's call it as we see it.  The poster child for climate change should have the fact of its recognizability and symbolism, incorporated into the name.  It would be truly a sign of changing times if the United States government chose a name like "Global Warming National Park", with the intention of recognizing the sadness that many plants, animals, and yes, people, are drastically affected in a negative way by climate change.

    David Alexander

    PlanetThoughts.org



    Love your Planet.
  7. DonnClark Posted 10:14 pm
    14 May 2007

    Glacier National Park -- New nameI think only one should be applied: "The George W. Bush Legacy National Park".
  8. amazingdrx Posted 11:43 pm
    14 May 2007

    Glacier-lite national parkThose lite beer companies could sponsor the makeover to put a lite coat of plastic snow where the glaciers used to be.  With beer logos dyed into the artificial snow!   Excellent!

    http://amazngdrx.blogharbor.com/blog
  9. amazingdrx Posted 1:21 am
    15 May 2007

    More entries!Glacier Free National Park...  warmer and safer!
    Chinese Billionaire National Park...  with the nation now bankrupt (due to contractors on america oil warring) and chinese billionaires holding the notes, why not sell them great spots for vacation Mcmansions in the parks!
    Mountain Golf Course National Park...  plenty of great high altitude golf space once those pesky glaciers are gone.

    http://amazngdrx.blogharbor.com/blog
  10. eriqa Posted 1:56 am
    15 May 2007

    Glaceau Water National ParkThe appearance of glaciers will be reconstructed with millions of discarded plastic "vitamin water" bottles.  
  11. JMG's avatar

    JMG Posted 2:57 am
    15 May 2007

    Or, ...American Enterprise Institute Ski Park
    Michaels, Lindzen, and Singer Glacier Research Park
     

    "An optimist is someone who thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. A pessimist is someone who is afraid that the optimist is right."
  12. Montanaebiker Posted 3:01 am
    15 May 2007

    welllll....I live only minutes from Glacier, so this contest made me laugh, and of course made me want to cry!
    I think the "Bush Legacy" is hilarious, but we should keep in mind that while Bush has certainly done nothing to reduce greenhouse gas emissions, and really nothing that could even vaguely be construed as "environmentally friendly," it's each and every one of us who have contributed to this problem. So my suggestion is... Warm and Droughty National Park - Monument to Humankind.
    It's rather ironic that Glacier is part of the Waterton-Glacier International Peace Park...what should we call that when there are no more glaciers? The International War on Nature Park?
  13. Blitzkrieg59 Posted 3:07 am
    15 May 2007

    Gacier renaming...How about "Cold Water National Park" or maybe, "Bears and Stuff National Park." I'm diggin' those.

    "When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro." - H.S.T.
  14. Kate Sheppard's avatar

    Kate Sheppard Posted 3:33 am
    15 May 2007

    How 'bout ...Bank of America National Park

    Kate Sheppard
  15. Jones Posted 11:33 pm
    15 May 2007

    Crisitunity...Why not enjoy the bold, crisp taste (TM) of Pure Glacier Water National Park (TM)?
    OK, without a glacier, the park would clearly have to close... but they're sitting on a marketing goldmine. More than twenty years of a cool, clean-tasting (TM) Pure Glacier Water (TM) resource that any number of beverage companies would be dying to get their hands on. And of course: it's organic!
    Best of all, by the time the meltwater resource finally gives out, all that transportation and bottling activity will have created opportunities at other glaciers further north.
    I think you should--no, must--take advantage of this uprecedented opportunity. We can't let dreary, misanthropic  environmentalists deprive millions of Americans their birthright to the clean, cold taste (TM) of Pure Glacier Water (TM).
    Of course, the park should be privatised and sold to a comapny that needs to diversify, Exxon Mobil, who could rename it American/Competitive Enterprise Park in honour of the entrepreneurial spirit of America. They could then sell the water consessions to some like-minded organisation that may recently have lost part of its funding...a perfect partnership.
  16. redwing Posted 3:41 am
    16 May 2007

    hmmmmExxon national park (paid for in part by the Bush administration)
    We could carve a giant X into the side of the mountain, and put an oil well right in the center!! Surround it with mini malls and gas stations! MMM they could serve Oil slick glacier slushies! I can't wait to go.
  17. MarchDancer Posted 11:21 am
    22 May 2007

    The Big SnowWe visited Glacier during an unpredicted and very destructive blizzard about 20-25 years ago. Only the two largest lodges, one at each end, built originally as destination resorts by the huge monopoly railroads were open for guests. These hotels are always spartan and luxurious at the same time, a dichotomy that must be seen and felt to be understood. Soon, no more blizzards other than those composed of sunspots; no roadways closed because of the depth of the snow; soon no more glaciers to keep the name of Glacier National Park with any meaning.
    I propose: Lack of Blizzards National Park

    In Peace, Harmony and Unity may we find ways to work together to meet our common goal - the health of our earthly Home.
  18. Randy1 Posted 2:01 am
    04 Jun 2007

    Glacier National ParkHow about "The Exxon Glacier Eraser National Park"

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